Beauregard - Beagle
Home: Indianapolis, IN
Birthday: Tue, May 16 2006
Gender: Male
Weight: 23 lbs
Let the World Be Your Chew Toy
Tue, July 17 2007
I have my best bone! Oh Boy! My Favorite!
It's a rope-made clone! Oh Boy! My Favorite!
Here's the stuffed squirrel! Oh Boy!. . .
Food Rain Down - A Poem
Fri, August 31 2007
(with sincerest apologies to the members of Collective Soul for mangling such a great song as Shine)
Give me some kibble,
. . .
I'm Going Hungry - A Poem
[With full apologies to all the members of Temple of the Dog … the greatest band name that this beagle has ever heard of … f. . .
Long's!
Oh boy! Oh boy! I discovered a new food when I jumped from floor to chair to dining room table this morning! Long's doughnuts! O. . .
Bark - A Poem
[With full apologies to Van Halen, again, this time for messing up "Jump"]
I wake up,
I think I heard sound.
I gotta sniff
. . .
Corrected - A Song
[Based on … well, ripped from “Connected” by the Stereo MC’s]
Bbbbbbbad dog!
[Arf arf ar-arf, Arf arf ar-arf ]
. . .
My Possession - A Poem
[With full apologies to Animotion for mucking about with their one hit.]
[Beau]
It’s my possession (my possession)
I ca. . .
Why Do You Always Bathe - A Poem
[With full apologies to David Allen Coe … and Steve Goodman ... for ruining the perfect country and western song]
Well it . . .
Hey, we're getting free HBO!
Perl's wearing a satellite dish now, but she won't let me watch ESPN! This is so unfair. I'm going to chew on a biped's dress sh. . .
Perl's Surgery
Perl went away this morning and came back this afternoon! I missed her so much!
But she's acting wrong. She's tired and whini. . .
Breath Like Kibble - A Poem
[Based on a song by Echo and the Bunnymen, who had the best hair in 80s music]
She howls for her food,
Drinks with a dribb. . .
Ritter's!
We went to Ritter's last night! Oh boy! My favorite! They gave us custard and dog biscuits numnumnumnumnumnumnumnum ... Oh, and . . .
Happy Dog - A Song
[With apologies to The Beat Farmers for messing with Happy Boy]
I’m running in the yard on a warm spring day,
Snuffle snuf. . .
Another foster!!!
Okay, we got a new foster dog! Foster dogs! Oh boy! My favorite! But it's a girl! Named Sophie! And she's not paying attention t. . .
Scottie - A Poem
[With sincerest apologies to Smash Mouth for toying with “All-Star”! I love Smash Mouth! But not as much as Smash Taters! . . .
Another one?!?!
We might be getting another foster! And this time it's a female! Hound harem! Oh boy! My favorite!
. . .
Weimeraner - A Poem
[Based on Judas Priest's "Turbo Lover"]
You won't hear me.
But you'll feel me.
Without warning,
I am coming for you! (For . . .
Beagle Girl - A Poem
[With sincerest apologies to The Dead Milkmen for messing with "Punk Rock Girl"]
One day I sat in one of HSI’s small park. . .
Won't Get Fenced Again - A Poem
We are running through the streets,
With a blur that is our feets,
And the fences that once held us are long gone.
And the . . .
Guard That Big Ol Backyard - A Poem
[Based on "Play That Funky Music". I would apologize to Wild Cherry, but I just can't bring myself to do it. This and others are. . .
Fat Bottom Hounds - A Poem
[With apologies to the members of Queen]
Aw, you gonna chew pig ears tonight
Aw, gonna crunch with all your might.
Aw, yo. . .
Yeah Dogs - A Poem
[With sincerest apologies to Heywood Banks, that virtuoso of the Toastmaster 4-Slice.]
[NOTE: This one isn't 100% politically. . .
A Frank Zappa Tribute
Dreamed I was a malamute.
Frozen wind blew like a flute
Under my paws and around my snoot.
Around the hill and o'er the butte. . .
Beauie B Goode - A Poem
Way up in Indiana, just outside Southport,
Back up a cul-de-sac, near a kid's play fort,
There is a big house where the beagle. . .
Long-Eared Beagle Boy - A Poem
[With apologies to Charlie Daniels]
People say I’m goofy, and loud as a bassoon.
When I run hard in the morning, I sleep. . .
Hugh is gone
Hugh is gone, Hugh is gone away for good! I heard the male biped listening to someone named Bee Bee King, and it seems right. We. . .
I Like Big Mutts - A Poem
[With apologies to Sir Mix-a-Lot]
[Perl]
Oh, my, god. Beauie, look at that mutt. It is so big. *scoff* It looks like, one of. . .
The Beagles Are Back in Town
[With sincerest apologies to the late Phil Lynnott]
Guess who just got back today?
Those wild-eyed hounds that had been away. . .
Guard the Tree - A Poem
[With the greatest of apologies to all the members of Belly]
This red squirrel I've stalked about
Broke into a run,
Scampe. . .
Popcorn!
They did it again! They made popcorn this weekend! Popcorn! Oh boy! My favorite! The female biped even trained me to lay down! Y. . .
Fat Behind - A Poem
Fat Behind
[With sincerest apologies to Candlebox for horking around with such a great song as Far Behind]
Now maybe, I . . .
Stairway to Popcorn - A Poem
Stairway to Popcorn
(with sincerest apologies to Messers Plant, Page, Jones, and Bonham)
We are beagles who know: that. . .
Ear infection
Right now I have an ear infection. I hate this! Mom has to clean my left ear twice a day, and this gooey medicine has to get wor. . .
Coffee
Out on the deck, o what a morning!
Here comes my Dad, this won't be boring!
In his left hand he carries a cup
Of brown hot li. . .
Ohboy!
Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Ohboy!Oh. . .
New going out place!!!
Oh boy! Oh boy! Oh boy! Mom and dad took us to this new place on Saturday! Oh boy! It's called Brown County! They had--! We did-. . .
Popcorn
Oh boy! Oh boy! Oh boy! Last night the large male biped made this kind of biped food called popcorn! Have you tried it?!?! Why h. . .
Feet!
We love feet! Perl and I both! Oh boy! My favorite! I'm always sticking my nose into shoes! Perl is always licking feet! Does th. . .
Biscuits!
I am ready to go inSANE! Last night Mom and Dad had baked chicken! Oh boy! My favorite! But then they had those Pillbury Grands . . .
Owner: Richard
About Me: Hi! I got a new family in April of 2007! I share them with this other beagle named Perl! I like food! Oh boy! My favorite! I graduated from that K9 Kollege in Beech Grove, just like Perl!
Nicknames: BOWWWWWruhgaaahd, Bowie, Sir Barks-a-Lot
My Motto: Let the world be your chew toy! Oh boy! My favorite!
Likes: Food! Sleep! Running! Food! Shoes! Toys! Food!
Pet-peeves: That darn invisible barrier that shocks me when I leave the yard. Those bipeds are fickle gods
Best Tricks: I can leap five feet in the air to snatch food from anyone's hand!
Favorite Activities: Running! Howling! Chasing Perl! Being chased by Perl! Chewing! Food!
Favorite Food: Popcorn! Yes! Or anything! More!
Favorite Toy: Anything on the floor! Or the bed! Or the table!
Favorite Walk: Any walk! I love walking! Oh boy! My favorite!
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