Ok, Dad accuses me all the time of cheating when we play. So, I decided to set the record straight by laying down what I consider the glamorous Boomer Rules of Playtime.

Boomer Rules of Playtime

1.) If it is in my mouth and it stops moving, then I win.

2.) If it is smaller than me, I win-I do have an ego to maintain.

3.) If you are lower than my eye level, I win again because I know I can overpower you, even if I choose not to pursue action.

4.) If you are bigger than me and I run and catch you, I win by default.

5.) If you are bigger and get away, consider yourself lucky.

6.) If you are bigger than me and I retreat to the stand by the door, it's a draw.
6a) The stand is the "safe zone." No attacking or tagging can be done at the safe zone.
6b) I determine when to leave the safe zone to resume play.

7.) I can use any natural advantages to me to win. This includes but not limited to:
-My awesome sight in darkness
-My awesome hearing
-Me being faster than you
-Me having better hearing
-Camouflage by my coat
-Ability to hide in tight spaces
-Extreme depth perception
If you do not have these, tough luck. You were the one who wanted to play afterall.

8.) If you are not a cat, you automatically lose, but are more than welcome to try to beat me. Sorry, but cats are the superior animal and are flawless compared to the other species...including humans.

Message to Dad-Sorry, but you always loose and I do not cheat. It's written right here in the Boomer Playbook. However, I will consider hiding the toys a bit of a cheating action on my part.